its my life

I received an email from a friend (?), and I know it's one of those chain mails again about making wishes and then forwarding it to 10 other friends lest your wishes won't come true. With lack of anything else to do, I opened it, and well, yeah, I'm right.

So I read it, something about helping an old lady, and then she became a fairy, and she'd grant me three wishes.

First is about my love life. So I was wondering what should i wish for. What I was hoping for. So I was thinking: I shouldn't ask for a boyfriend because having one depends on my decision, so I'll just be going on my own pace. And I thought I also shouldn't ask for a happy love life because the state of our relationship will depend on our performance, so our happiness will be based on how well we understand and trust each other. Then what about having a Yamapi look-alike as a lover? Iya-da! Because even though my love for Yamapi is....and even though I believe he is one of the most gorgeous Johnny's (at par with Jin and Takki), no no no. Well, after all, choosing who'll be my boyfriend will also be my decision, so good-looking or not, if I chose him, then what's Yamapi have to do with it? And so, what should I wish for? After thinking harder, I decided to give up. No, no wish for my love life. It's lacking anyway.

Then my second wish should be about my social life. Again, it got me thinking. I mean, what social life? Should I ask for more friends? But no, that's not possible because I choose my friends. Even though I get to meet lots and lots of people who could be a friend, I will only choose those who I think....well, I can't find the right description, but think about the lines of Jeff, Francis, Allan, Jenny, and Dize. So, umm, more time for me to act like a free and giddy 21-year old girl? Well, it could work, but how I spend my time will also be my responsibility. So, no thanks.

The third wish could be about anything. Huh?

Then I realized that things, events and situations which could be directly under my influence or my decisions, are things that I cannot wish for. After all, it's MY LIFE. I cannot wish for a better world because I have to LIVE in THIS world, no matter how much it sucks. I cannot wish for a better life because I have to LIVE in this life, no matter how much unfair life is. I could wish for things that depends entirely on luck, like winning the lottery ticket, or literally stumbling upon a pot of gold, or finding a very cute unowned puppy, or a winning ticket to a L'Arc~en~Ciel concert. Those are the things I could wish for, but I didn't. Why? Because during the time I read that mail, I couldn't make up my mind which of those above should I wish for. I think it's better not to wish for one, because all choices are so darn good.

I think I'm already rambling too much. Really, these guys (my OICs) should give me something to work on. I'm already getting too bored.

Umm.. I received another mail telling me that my email address won an award which was picked randomly by some company and something like that, and I won 1M Euro.

That's it?? The wish? Hah! Very funny, old lady-fairy.